Some days, human beings break my heart.
It’s nothing out of the ordinary; it’s just the way it hits me. Just all sorts of stupid things I notice sometimes, things that aren’t any different from anything any one of us does on any given day. But watching others fumble through their lives some days, it’s just heartbreaking, I don’t know why. The futility of their efforts, their failed attempts at...everything. The eternal hope and subsequent, inevitable eternal failure is just excruciating sometimes:
Some grumpy kid being dragged behind his clueless parents on an outing that started out fun but isn’t anymore.
Some lonely, heavyset girl eating alone, her long-anticipated meal of a sandwich and a yogurt so much of a letdown even after only a few bites.
Some older lady waiting for a delayed flight in her stupid new boots. You can sense her disappointment in the world reflected in the shiny silver buckles, her disdain for things that don’t turn out her way in the care with which she perches them on her stool’s footrest.
Some days all the sad, crushed high hopes of the ever-hopeful human race are right there, plainly etched in the dead skin of a cow wrapped around some woman’s feet.
Other days, humans fill me full of rage. Our unfathomably stupid, thick-headed bloody-mindedness. Our relentless selfishness. The endless wells of self-deception we lug around with us.
On those days it amazes me we ever survived our trip down out of the trees.