Wednesday, December 3, 2008

christmas gone too far

i can't even see the house under all that

Dear Wacky Brit-Dude:

Jesus here. Hey, saw a story about how you decorate (desecrate?) your house with over $60,000 worth of lights and gadgets and stuff every Christmas. And how you’ve been acquiring decorations since you were ten, and how you start the decorating process in October in order to get it all finished by the time the holiday rolls around.

And hey, no one can say you haven’t worked hard on this. Seriously. I sure can’t fault you for your enthusiasm!

But here’s the thing: stop it. This is utterly ridiculous. And tacky as hell. Your house looks like someone ate Times Square, chased it with the Vegas Strip and puked the whole thing up on a small house.

I mean, what the hell are you thinking? Forget about how far you’ve strayed from the original story of Christmas -- remember the simple manger? The straw and donkeys and sheep and shit? What about the effects your house has on your neighbors? You have heard of global warming, right? Not to mention the cost of your monthly electric bill.

Goddamn, son, do me a favor and shut off the lights and send the money you would have spent on your power bill to a charity or a soup kitchen or something. That would be the more Me-like thing to do, my friend.

I guess what I’m trying to say is, thanks, but no thanks.


JC out.

(via fark. and sry for the small pic--the only one avail on the orig story site. kjb out)

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