Tuesday, March 13, 2012
musical dogs
And I can't get my dog to stop eating cat poop out of the litter box.
Friday, January 14, 2011
it's so true
Yes, yes and yes.
via reblogged from here.
There's a 'fixed' version of this on reddit somewhere that depicts women as the cat (go away. come back. i like you. no i don't.) and is tres amusing, but i couldn't find it.
Thursday, September 23, 2010
mena
It's been a while since I posted here, and I hope you'll forgive me but it's been a pretty traumatic week.
Lost one of the doggies, Mena, last Wednesday, and it's still very weird going on with life. She was only 12 and seemed perfectly healthy until a pair of masses on her spleen that had metastasized up to her heart burst open and bled out. We had no idea they were there; she was running around and playing fetch three days prior to her death.
There was nothing to be done; she was bleeding internally for a couple of days, but even if I had gotten her to the vet immediately there was no surgery or anything that could save her. Once there are masses on the heart, it's pretty much over.
But I keep telling myself she had a good life--and she did; she came from the shelter after being picked up on the street and was maybe 25 pounds underweight when we got her. She had no idea really of how to be a dog. In such a way that I conjecture that she was a street dog for a long time, or maybe a farm dog who got out. Playing fetch was a brand-new concept, as were sit, and stay.
Her street-life came out in that she was always very clear with other dogs that she was not to be fucked with. She never started shit, but no matter how big or tough other dogs seemed, she always marched right up to check them out, and essentially challenge them to start something if they wanted.
But once the initial posturing was over, she loved to play. She would do that puppy thing where dogs spin completely around in one hop, or she would bump into the other dog with her flank in hopes of getting them to chase her. She did that her whole life, and while she used to hop straight up in the air when we were getting ready to go somewhere, almost getting high enough that she was face-to-face with me, she had somewhat mellowed on that in recent old age.
And she loved people, all people all the time. When we first got her she would bolt all the way across the track at the old Fort Collins High School to go greet some new arrival, just out of sheer enthusiasm for life.
But platitudes and memories are cold comfort. She was a sweet, sweet, gentle girl and I miss her a great deal. There is an absence in my life and my house and both Sabi and Ben feel it too.
I'm just spending a lot of time with those two, remembering to gather rosebuds while I may.
Pet your dog or your cat for me today, please, right now, if you read this. Tell them how much you love them for me.
Miss you, honey.
Saturday, June 20, 2009
untitled short story
this is a pic of a newfie i found online. i don't know why i picked this breed to write about. they're just so innocent and monstrously huge at the same time, i guess.Max would never admit it, not least of all because it was so pathetic, but at that point the walks were the closest thing to fun he had in his life. Despite his best efforts, and completely without his permission, the dogs cheered him up in the wake of Jeannie’s departure. Wading through the overgrown, oddly-shaped amoeba of land that had been left over after the housing boom fizzled, the dogs’ excitement inevitably rubbed off, even on Max’s worst days.
They would tear through the weeds and sporadic patches of hay that held on despite the landowner’s evident long-term disinterest in farming, chasing anything they could stir up. If nothing that lived there felt like participating, Stan would end up chasing Jack, or at least loop around behind him in semi-circles, barking occasionally, just to remind the bigger dog who was in charge.
There was a fenced-off, city-sanctioned dog park half a mile off to the south, a place of institutionalized merriment such as they were having here in the wilds, but it might as well have been on another planet. The one time Max and his dogs had set foot inside the fence, they had encountered a muddy caldron speckled with brightly-colored packs of yapping, over-privileged housewives, studiously ignoring their yapping, over-privileged dogs--invariably tiny, nervous creatures--as they ran through each other’s shit.
The dogs, not the housewives.
No, the rough meadow was more their speed. It dangled like an unflickable booger stuck to the finger of their cul-de-sac, perched between the trim houses and the chiseled, hoary edge of the foothills. It was quiet, with a sliver of a creek tributary running along one side--perfect for happy-dog-swimming-time--and a string of cottonwoods along the banks for shade in the summer.
And there were hardly ever any other people there, making it the perfect place for someone like Max to stroll.
He didn’t actually see the boy, at first. What Max saw was his dogs barking like mad and racing toward a spot on the edge of an overgrown irrigation ditch.
Max barely gave them a glance as he walked on, lost in thought. It was nothing new, these commotions canidae. Jack crashing through the tall weeds, chasing a real or imagined bird, chuffing out his basso profundo “howrouffs” as little Stan struggled to catch up, the periscope tip of his tail and his frustrated yippings the only evidence of his existence--this was a sight Max was used to.
It was only when the furry duo stopped cold at a spot twenty or thirty yards out that Max took notice.
“Hey! Leave it, you two,” he called out. “Whatever it is.”
They ignored him, as usual. Max could see Jack’s waggling black haunches, bedraggled with bits of chaff and burrs, the force of his tail’s enthusiasm nearly tipping him over.
Stan, as usual, just yipped and barked madly, occasionally hopping straight up like a stubby, mutant kangaroo, peeking back at Max over the top of the grass as if to say, “Ooh, wait till you see what the big, stupid one did this time! He’s gonna be in trouble!”
“I said LEAVE IT you guys!” Max picked up his pace to catch them before they rolled in something putrid. It wouldn’t be the first time they had discovered a rotting, unidentifiable carcass and proceeded to joyously squirm around in it, embedding the scent deep within their fur.
Lest any deer or wildebeest or mastodons they might end up stalking later smell them from afar.
At least he hadn’t let Her name the dogs. He would freely admit that Stanley and Jack were ridiculous names for dogs. They sounded like the first names of an accounting firm’s partners: “Offices of Liebowitz and Rothstein, just ask for Stan and Jack!”
But if She had named them, he’d be forever shouting after Sunflower and Chakra or some shit while she made pottery or painted irises or whatever it was she did with her former therapist Melanie--aka Moonshadow--in New Mexico.
Max hustled up to where the dogs were still going nuts over the discovery they had made.
“All right, that’s enough, guys,” he said, forcing his way into the weeds next to Jack. The big dog had his butt in the air, deadly tail thwapping back and forth, pulverizing Max’s internal organs as he stepped past. The beast was peering down into the main trunk of a drainage ditch, four or five feet wide, mostly dry this time of year, though with patches of mud showing through the growth in low spots. Jack was howrouffing frantically at a strip of dun-colored cloth that was woven into the strands of grass, and creeping forward down a shallow part of the slope.
“Jack, you’re an idiot,” Max sighed. He had long suspected that a bag of weed that had gone missing when Jack was a puppy was among the casualties of the gentle giant’s voracious appetite and curiosity. He had no solid evidence of Jack’s drug-related crime, but most anything imaginable had at some point turned up post-digestive tract in the back yard--from tiny bits of a brand-new pair of Nikes, to shredded strips of tennis ball, to very small rocks. The theoretical crime fit Jack’s M.O.
Plus the dog just wasn’t right in the head.
The big dog stared at the spot down below, growling and wagging. The dogs knew they weren’t supposed to go down into the ditch. Aside from mud, Max had seen rusted sheets of metal, snarls of barbed wire, palettes, old shoes, tires--not to mention numerous articles of clothing, perhaps blown there; perhaps left behind by amorous, thick-skinned kids with nowhere else to go.
He idly wondered, where do all those random bits of clothing you see everywhere come from? Do people still use clotheslines? Or maybe everyone in the world--besides me--is constantly going at it in cars, wildly tossing aside underwear, shirts and the odd shoe in the throes of--
And then something under the strands of long grass coughed.
Wednesday, July 2, 2008
dream

Dream 07.02.08
Patches on again, and so dreams getting weird again. This one I’m sure stems partially from last night when I got the dogs back from Erica, after she had a little doggie vacation for them down in pueblo for a week. I picked them up in downtown Denver after a rehearsal, and so that’s kind of stressful in and of itself. Then the drive back involved about 30 minutes of sitting in traffic at one of the many, many wonderful places our state dept. of transportation has decided to tear up on I-25 this summer. So with panting, thirsty dogs in the back, and a frustrating drive, it kind of makes sense that I had this weird dream.
I am in a frat house of some kind, but it’s out on a green heath, away from anything. It’s a gray late afternoon day. Like early winter, with snow coming soon from a heavy sky. The house is packed with frat-type guys, who are busy extracting money from people for various bullshit things. Eric is there, and he has gotten in trouble with these guys over something, and I am trying to get him away from them. But they are playing like they’re all Tony Soprano, and saying even though he wants out of the deal he had originally arranged they were going to charge him a ‘cancellation fee’ of like $50 or something. He looked like shit, like he was strung out or something, and I finally paid them, I think, and told him to come on, but he kept delaying by the door waiting for those douchebags to do something or give him permission to leave.
Finally I get him out of there, and we walk up a hill toward another building, where I am going to get my dogs from someone. When we top the hill, it turns out that it is actually Folsom Field in Boulder. We are in the building attached to it and looking down into the stadium, and among the seats there we can see that the frat guys have a bunch of dogs on leashes, two of which are Sabi and Mena. They are kind of mocking everybody, holding the dogs and saying we are going to have to pay them to get them back.
I am pissed.
I go back into the building I think to find a way down to where they are. It them becomes one of those ‘you are almost lost, but you know where you need to get, but there is no way to get where you want to get, and time is running out dreams.’ It kind of faded out from there, as the dream-wiper was hard at work.
